Thursday, September 24, 2009

Gotta Get 3 Wolf Shirt Now

You just have to go read some of the product reviews on this shirt and laugh, wonder how these people feed themselves, are actually in mental institutions hell I just could not stop laughing and thought I'd share.

And the comments on the reviews is a whole other gold mine of laughs...

By 3Wolves Rule "Carney" (Dilworth, Alabama) - See all my reviews

As a semi-professional carnival ride technician I have seen many things but nothing like the awesome powers stitched into the fabric of the three wolf and moon t-shirt. I originally won this shirt at a cock-fight behind my girlfriend's could I have known that within 24 hours I would be called upon to act.

The next night, while working the centipede ride, I heard a scream that would make you grind your tooth. I grabbed a 13 year old kid to watch the ride and then, with my last three cans of Meister Brau, went out to investigate. As I turned the corner I saw a sight that haunts me to this day. A tractor had jack-knifed and rolled over. Trapped beneath the trailer of sweet corn was my cousin/girlfriend, Crystal. Although I couldn't see her face I knew it was her from the orange and red hair and the tattoo of Jeff Gordon on her right arm, the tattoo of Dale Earnhardt Jr. on her left arm, the tattoo of her ex-boyfriend, "Junior" on her left ankle, the tattoo of a lion on her left shoulder, the tattoo of a rose on her right thigh, the tattoo of a panda on her right ankle and the names of our first two boys, Garth and Brooks tattooed on her right leg.

Like the wolves would do when one of their own was in danger I put down my beer and began to lift on the trailer that was pinning my sweet Crystal. I cannot say with any certainty if it was me, the wolves or the 14 other fellers helping me lift but with super-human strength we raised that trailer and pulled Crystal from danger.

Crystal and I have since given up the carnival circuit and are enrolled in a training program we saw on the television that says we can earn up to [...]/week. The extra money will come in handy with the new twins, Randy and Travis. As for the three wolves t-shirt, I know in my heart it was the power of the wolves that saved Crystal that day so I hung it over the kitchen sink as a curtain so it can protect our family.

h/t Wallstreetjackass

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